{SWING}

the first day back here was soso
i was yearning for sth
and that become bad....
too much expectation bring more disappointment
i care too much, and it makes me feel sad
i feel jealous, that is bad, that means i care, and maybe too much

TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY OF THE REST OF MY LIFE

the second day of the sunshine blvd.
it becomes worse
i'm a disappointment
the voice is winding around in my head
i get upset
i can't sleep well
i wanna cry but i dont wanna cry
i dont want to see anyone
i lost my energy

EVERYONE IS DISAPPOINTING, THE MORE YOU KNOW SOMEONE

today is the third day(officially)
i lost my energy
finally i took a nap in the afternoon for couple of hrs
i want to go there but a voice says NO
be cool be calm
be you and do the thing that is really what you want, not for anyone else
i stay at room
it was quite
i did some study, not much
i was keeping hoping someone could speak for me, announce my sadness
anyways
it solved in the way i want
i got a great time
before dinner, at the dinner, after dinner
well....i dont want to care anymore
i get jealous again just minuets ago
i should feel lucky, not sad or jealous
i dont get man, i dont get girls either
maybe i just consider too much
maybe there is nothing going on

i have to build up my muscle
physically, emotionally
build up the strength to facing the pressure, to hold on the determination, steady my affection