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Henton’s Big Shoes--By Hueitze (Whittak) >>
January 10,2009
He ain't heavy, he's my brother—Remembering my dear brother Henton
My brother Whittak (Hueitze) translated my Kanji article for deploring the death of Henton so that we could share sadness with our English speaking relatives, friends and our children.
Taipei time 1/6/2009 11am, I lost my dear brother Henton.
Taipei time 1/6/2009 11am, I lost my dear brother Henton.
During my high school years, brother 2 (Hueitze) study Physics, Henton (brother 3) study Chemical Engineering in Taita. Both came back to Yuenlin during summer break, they all love to sing, both sang in the university choir, Henton was baritone, brother 2 second base, oldest brother (Fu-Min, already married) tenor, they often sang “Do not keep a gold fish in the glass“ 杯底不可飼金魚，and also the “Taita Anthem” (underground) “Longing for the spring breeze” 望春風, usually I enjoyed being the audience.
One day at home, a guy came out of the blue, saying he wanted to tell our fortune. We did not believe in such things as fortune telling, in addition we do not have money to pay him, so we declined. The fortune teller left without earning our business, but pointed to Henton saying “I saw darkness in your forehead, there would be misfortune”. We got quite agitated and showed him out the door.
Birth, aging, illness and death are all part of life. We grew up financially not welloff in anyway, so Henton lived simply, just like all my brothers, having to tutor high school kids in order to pay for the tuition and food. Henton was very shrift and was not watching out for good nutrition, living in the dormitory with a lee than desirable sanitation in the dinning hall, one year, he was among many students who was struck with Hepatitis. That may be what the fortune teller’s saying.
30-40 years ago, that is a serious matter, thanks to out practicing medical Doctor Uncle, he took Henton in and nursed him back to health so Henton was able to finish the college, beginning a new chapter of his life.
1984 I and wife Edda immigrated to New York City, 3 years later; Henton got his government scholarship and entered Yale graduate school in New Haven, Connecticut.During that time, we visited him often, and attended the commencement for his PH.D.
In the picture, he was very happy knowing he is ready to return home and be of use. My 2 daughters were only 2 and 5.
Later he study Russian himself, and in 10 years he was fluent in reading writing and speaking. A few years ago, he told me that he was learning Korean.
With the Russian language, he is the first lead science representative in the Taiwanese embassy in Moscow and he became a true diplomat to Russia. He said there were much advanced Russian sciences that he wanted to learn.
I often tease him as “gone to Russia north sea to raise sheeps”. Truly, Russia is classified as the D countries, the most challenging living place to be as a foreign diplomat. Not only that, he also covered surrounding countries of the former Soviet Union with conditions even worse than Russia.In the past 6 years, his pioneering work opened much communication and un-precedent technology collaboration.
After these years, going from a scientist to being also a diplomat, he can even bottom up a glass of Vodka. His hard work and eager to over-achieve might have caused him to overlook his own health and well being.
Nov. 11, 2008, Henton and Kuemei return to Taipei suddenly. I was informed that he checked into Hsin-kuan Hospital with bad news. Subsequently, he was transferred to Her-Hsin Cancer center in Guandu. The prognosis was very bad with a Colon cancer tumor that is not operable and the metastases in the lung and the liver. Only thing left to do is chemo and hope for miracles.
I came to Taipei Nov. 24 to visit Henton for a few days and return back to LA. During those few precious days, hoping to see him and talk to him as much as can be. Early morning Fu-Min brought me to Guandu to visit. Long time no see; I felt lot of warms of love that can only be shared between brothers. He called me “Aren” just like he used to. He ask me if I remember he used to say to me when I was still small “你ㄙㄜ、我ㄙㄜ嗎？” he used to scratch my back during the hot summer to comfort me to sleep when I had outbreak of heat rashes.
When Kuemei left the room for a short while, Henton calmly told me “ Aren, I will fight for my life, but next time if you could not see me a….” I got all choked up; told him “Please don’t say that!”
December 1, I went to the hospital to say so long to him, only to see him sound asleep after a grueling series of tests, I could only touch him, sadly left.Back in LA, I telephone him and told him “I love you, brother, fight!” we both cried in the phone.
Henton’s condition was going down hill, after the first chemo, the doctor was hesitating, but he insisted. The doctor did the second chemo with reduced dosage. Afterward, there was not much the doctor could do, only thing was to make sure Henton is not suffering.
January 5, 2009 my niece sent me a messenger note: Uncle is in coma.
January 6, 2009 I was working with my computer, the message said: Uncle has left.
I felt the heavy weight of the messages and the sadness came upon me.
When Henton was in college, he had a classmate who as quite ill, he played Smetana’s poetic orchestra “My Homeland” (Ma’ Vlast) to comfort him. I liked this music, It has a soothing flow, yet carried a tint of blue and ending with a slow sigh.
Henton, my dear brother, I wish I could’ve played this to you again while you were in the hospital, just like you did for your friend.
Henton was only 60, full of life and wisdom, but left like a falling star across the sky. This poetic music seems to describe Henton’s life.
Life and death, looking from natural law, from philosophy, or from religion is an inevitable thing that happens to all of us. However, the sorrow of separation is not something to explain away, only un-controllable tears.
My beloved father, mother and brother Henton seemingly walked the same path that ticks away the life in this earthly world, nothing we could do about, except helpless sighs.
When we were young, there was this song called “ He ain’t heavy, he’s my brother” I loved to play. Tonight, I listened to it again, the song struck me specially with a deep-deep sorrow. My dear brother, let me play it for you here.
One day at home, a guy came out of the blue, saying he wanted to tell our fortune. We did not believe in such things as fortune telling, in addition we do not have money to pay him, so we declined. The fortune teller left without earning our business, but pointed to Henton saying “I saw darkness in your forehead, there would be misfortune”. We got quite agitated and showed him out the door.
Birth, aging, illness and death are all part of life. We grew up financially not welloff in anyway, so Henton lived simply, just like all my brothers, having to tutor high school kids in order to pay for the tuition and food. Henton was very shrift and was not watching out for good nutrition, living in the dormitory with a lee than desirable sanitation in the dinning hall, one year, he was among many students who was struck with Hepatitis. That may be what the fortune teller’s saying.
30-40 years ago, that is a serious matter, thanks to out practicing medical Doctor Uncle, he took Henton in and nursed him back to health so Henton was able to finish the college, beginning a new chapter of his life.
1984 I and wife Edda immigrated to New York City, 3 years later; Henton got his government scholarship and entered Yale graduate school in New Haven, Connecticut.During that time, we visited him often, and attended the commencement for his PH.D.
In the picture, he was very happy knowing he is ready to return home and be of use. My 2 daughters were only 2 and 5.
Later he study Russian himself, and in 10 years he was fluent in reading writing and speaking. A few years ago, he told me that he was learning Korean.
With the Russian language, he is the first lead science representative in the Taiwanese embassy in Moscow and he became a true diplomat to Russia. He said there were much advanced Russian sciences that he wanted to learn.
I often tease him as “gone to Russia north sea to raise sheeps”. Truly, Russia is classified as the D countries, the most challenging living place to be as a foreign diplomat. Not only that, he also covered surrounding countries of the former Soviet Union with conditions even worse than Russia.In the past 6 years, his pioneering work opened much communication and un-precedent technology collaboration.
After these years, going from a scientist to being also a diplomat, he can even bottom up a glass of Vodka. His hard work and eager to over-achieve might have caused him to overlook his own health and well being.
Nov. 11, 2008, Henton and Kuemei return to Taipei suddenly. I was informed that he checked into Hsin-kuan Hospital with bad news. Subsequently, he was transferred to Her-Hsin Cancer center in Guandu. The prognosis was very bad with a Colon cancer tumor that is not operable and the metastases in the lung and the liver. Only thing left to do is chemo and hope for miracles.
I came to Taipei Nov. 24 to visit Henton for a few days and return back to LA. During those few precious days, hoping to see him and talk to him as much as can be. Early morning Fu-Min brought me to Guandu to visit. Long time no see; I felt lot of warms of love that can only be shared between brothers. He called me “Aren” just like he used to. He ask me if I remember he used to say to me when I was still small “你ㄙㄜ、我ㄙㄜ嗎？” he used to scratch my back during the hot summer to comfort me to sleep when I had outbreak of heat rashes.
When Kuemei left the room for a short while, Henton calmly told me “ Aren, I will fight for my life, but next time if you could not see me a….” I got all choked up; told him “Please don’t say that!”
December 1, I went to the hospital to say so long to him, only to see him sound asleep after a grueling series of tests, I could only touch him, sadly left.Back in LA, I telephone him and told him “I love you, brother, fight!” we both cried in the phone.
Henton’s condition was going down hill, after the first chemo, the doctor was hesitating, but he insisted. The doctor did the second chemo with reduced dosage. Afterward, there was not much the doctor could do, only thing was to make sure Henton is not suffering.
January 5, 2009 my niece sent me a messenger note: Uncle is in coma.
January 6, 2009 I was working with my computer, the message said: Uncle has left.
I felt the heavy weight of the messages and the sadness came upon me.
When Henton was in college, he had a classmate who as quite ill, he played Smetana’s poetic orchestra “My Homeland” (Ma’ Vlast) to comfort him. I liked this music, It has a soothing flow, yet carried a tint of blue and ending with a slow sigh.
Henton, my dear brother, I wish I could’ve played this to you again while you were in the hospital, just like you did for your friend.
Henton was only 60, full of life and wisdom, but left like a falling star across the sky. This poetic music seems to describe Henton’s life.
Life and death, looking from natural law, from philosophy, or from religion is an inevitable thing that happens to all of us. However, the sorrow of separation is not something to explain away, only un-controllable tears.
My beloved father, mother and brother Henton seemingly walked the same path that ticks away the life in this earthly world, nothing we could do about, except helpless sighs.
When we were young, there was this song called “ He ain’t heavy, he’s my brother” I loved to play. Tonight, I listened to it again, the song struck me specially with a deep-deep sorrow. My dear brother, let me play it for you here.
The road is long
With many a winding turn
That leads us to who knows where
Who knows where
But I'm strong
Strong enough to carry him
He ain't heavy, he's my brother
So on we go
His welfare is of my concern
No burden is he to bear
We'll get there
For I know
He would not encumber me
He ain't heavy, he's my brother
If I'm laden at all
I'm laden with sadness
That everyone's heart
Isn't filled with the gladness
Of love for one another
It's a long, long road
From which there is no return
While we're on the way to there
Why not share
And the load
Doesn't weigh me down at all
He ain't heavy he's my brother
He's my brother
He ain't heavy, he's my brother
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Dear Kwei-Mei,Zuhan and Emma,
I like to send you our condolences and prayers in this difficult time. I am very sorry about Henton. Sophie and Gemma are also sending their condolences and love to you all. Sophie sent a get well card to the hospital for Henton a few days before he passed away. Hope you will get it. Sophie always remembers the two weeks she stayed with your family after her graduation from college. She was so impressed with how nice Hen Ton was and,of course,all of you. Hen Ton was a very good man and he will be surely missed by all his family and friends. I am sorry that we happened to live apart in all these years but I want to tell you that you are in our thoughts and prayers. I lighted some candles for him at our small altar and I think it was on or about the hour of his death. Somehow,I had the feeling that he would be going especially after Whittak informed me of his condition. Whittak will surely miss him,big time. If there is a heaven, he will surely be there. He was a very good husband, father, brother and friend to all. It was a very fortunate circumstance that we were able to see him still alive last December and at least said "Good bye" to him.
I will always remember the happy times we spent together as family even though they were short vacations here and there- in Colorado,in Yale,and in Taiwan. We enjoyed those times we roamed around the campus in Yale,the walks we took in the Rocky Mountain parks and the dinners we shared eating sushis and the delicious roasted duck that Kwei-Mei cooked at your place. One of these days,I will dig into the pictures when the kids were still small and I will send you copies.Take care of yourselves and we'll get together again soon.
Love and prayers,Edette
I like to send you our condolences and prayers in this difficult time. I am very sorry about Henton. Sophie and Gemma are also sending their condolences and love to you all. Sophie sent a get well card to the hospital for Henton a few days before he passed away. Hope you will get it. Sophie always remembers the two weeks she stayed with your family after her graduation from college. She was so impressed with how nice Hen Ton was and,of course,all of you. Hen Ton was a very good man and he will be surely missed by all his family and friends. I am sorry that we happened to live apart in all these years but I want to tell you that you are in our thoughts and prayers. I lighted some candles for him at our small altar and I think it was on or about the hour of his death. Somehow,I had the feeling that he would be going especially after Whittak informed me of his condition. Whittak will surely miss him,big time. If there is a heaven, he will surely be there. He was a very good husband, father, brother and friend to all. It was a very fortunate circumstance that we were able to see him still alive last December and at least said "Good bye" to him.
I will always remember the happy times we spent together as family even though they were short vacations here and there- in Colorado,in Yale,and in Taiwan. We enjoyed those times we roamed around the campus in Yale,the walks we took in the Rocky Mountain parks and the dinners we shared eating sushis and the delicious roasted duck that Kwei-Mei cooked at your place. One of these days,I will dig into the pictures when the kids were still small and I will send you copies.Take care of yourselves and we'll get together again soon.
Love and prayers,Edette
Posted by Edette
at January 11,2009 04:38
Andy and I liked your blog article. I thought it was very touching and I learned a lot about uncle Henton that I didn't know before. I also recognized that picture of us at his commencement :) I hope you are doing ok. Please take care of yourself in this time!
Posted by witwht
at January 11,2009 16:29
It’s a very sad story. I would like to express my deepest condolence to Henton’s sudden death.
Posted by 契科夫斯基
at January 14,2009 22:21
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