Antonia's Secret Garden

馑将此文送给我的一个朋友
纪念我们认识六周年

即使他也许不会看到这篇文章

—— by MO

Yesterday's conversation made me keep awake till midnight
I couldn't go to sleep cos my brain was full of you
Every moving,happy,interesting even sad scene I had with you
appeared in my brain contineously,just like a movie
I tried very hard to push you out of my brian
cos I know that every time I think of you and our past would make me
uneasy for several days
So I tried my best to think of you as little as possible these years
Sometimes you complaint that I rarely contacted you
Please don't blame me
I dare not to touch the part of you in my heart

When I see your name lightening on msn
there is a complicated feeling inside of me
I really wanna talk to you
But I don't know how
And I'm so afraid that the conversation might be unpleasant
that I hardly talked to you

I don't know how long the situation is gonna last
Maybe there will be an end in 20 days
Maybe there will be another 4 years for us to hesitate
The day that we have both been looking forward for 6 years finally comes
The ending comes
Wil it be a happy ending?
I don't know

When a relationgship that lasted for such a long time
(6 years is long I suppose)
we have experienced every stage of keeping a relationship
I really doubt how would it develope if in the following 4 years we could be together
On one hand,I want to be with you
On the other hand,I don't want to be with you
I become a no smart girl when it comes to the issue of you
When I speak to you
I can feel the change of my tone,my laughter,even my face
I'm nervous in front of you
I wanna be perfect in front of you
You are stronger than me in our relationship
which is the reason I don't wanna be with you
I don't wanna be too tired

But I remember so many things relating to you
The French you wrote in my memory book
The rainy day you appeared in front of me with an umbrella
The letters you wrote to me
The messages you send to me
The call from you in the night of my first day in WFLS
The tears in that English Exam
The days we played badminton together
The gift you gave me on my birthday(I really like it,and also the way you gave me)
6 years
So many things happened
But one didn't change

SIX YEARS AGO WE WERE FRIENDS
NOW WE ARE STILL FRIENDS

From friends to friends
So ironic~

In the last
I truely wish that you can get a satisfactory result on 7&8 th of JUNE